To find a relationship with God, I had to journey alone. I was not seeking, I was floating; no goal, no direction, but no pressure or need for either. I enjoyed life as it came and rejoiced in each day.
As family drew me back into church activities, I found that God had never left me and that I had never left God. I left the noise, confusion and structure of laws created by men and found God everywhere waiting for me. Finding God is easy – God is everywhere and we are uniquely designed and attuned to rejoice in the presence of God. But we cannot be forced into the resonance that we are designed for; and the loudness of everyday life offers many distractions from that Grace.
Rich spiritual life must be discovered for each in his own way. And the essence of that life may differ greatly between believers. Some feel that God requires surrender of self and absolute adherence to laws; that God requires sacrifice, toil and effort. They must wrestle with angels and devils, believing that everything that is worthwhile must be earned through struggle and that powers abound that conspire to keep them from the “Truth”.
For me the path is easy, but like the swimmer who fights the tide can only be found with the realization that one’s direction is wrong. That realization might take time, it might take loss, it might take meditation or guidance, but for me at least, the only path to a deep meaningful relationship to God is to release myself and to allow my inerrant instincts to guide me to Him. The stream that is God runs with a current that is deep and strong. It pushes me away from obstacles that line the shores. The way is clear; but I not fight the current, but must allow my true self to be the rudder that guides me to the center of the stream.
Unfortunately quiet reflection, stillness, seeking without effort is foreign to most Westerners. It seems lazy and inscrutable, especially given the dogmatic religious education that most of us receive as children. We are exposed to a God of love while we are taught exclusion and hatred. We are told to fear God and turn from those who are different. We are told that Satan awaits around every turn by parents and preachers who make it all to easy to believe that God is some trickster figure who may only be approached by those who have earned some special dispensation through pain and suffering.
Why is it that we are so uncomfortable speaking of such a natural part of human life? And why is it that we look for someone to tell us what we should believe when faith is such a natural state for us all?
So how much of Tolstoy's late stuff have you read?
I’m mr. Short attention span theatre. I tried to read crime and punishment after lori finisheds it. I gave up after a while.
I am like you Jonathan except that I cannot sincerely be part of any church. I am still “swimming alone” in life and guided by a “goal” to be as accepting of other people's convictions as I possibly can, except when it is against “natural” law, or makes judgment over one person’s right(s) to the detriment of another.
But then the definition of personhood is another difficult subject and much controversy is among purist pro-lifers and judicious abortion rights defenders.
A secularist would define personhood of a human being starting at the moment of conception, (interestingly they agree in this with religion indoctrinated fanatics). I disagree; for everything living can be defined as such, except human beings, who even at birth don't have a personhood.
Humans are creatures that are not defined exclusively by their DNA programming,(other than their physical attributes) but learn and decide to act one way or another. Once they lived for about a decade or so they start to define themselves as persons. Even that is not the final person at the end of the “stream”, but the general course does start to crystallize into personhood.
To call abortion “murder” (especially in the embryonic stage at which point the “person” cannot survive outside its mother’s womb”) is wrong, because by such definition harvesting of plants or slaughtering of animals are “murder” too.
Even though I follow the teachings of Christ, most Christians consider me to NOT be a “Christian”, and so I no longer call myself that.